is fashioned in the manner of a member and sits upon the branch, fulfilling the promise to the dead man. A mystical memorial of this passion, phalli are set up in the cities to Dionysus; "for if they did not make a procession to Dionysus and sing a hymn to the privy parts, it would be a most shameless deed," says Heraclitus, "and Hades is the same as Dionysus, in whose honour they go mad and celebrate the Lenaean rites," not on account of the drunkenness of the body, as I think, so much as on account of the shameful sacred-rite of wantonness. 2.35.1 Rightly then have such gods of yours become slaves of passions, but even before the so-called Helots among the Lacedaemonians came under the yoke of slavery Apollo for Admetus in Pherae, Heracles for Omphale in Sardis, and Poseidon and Apollo served Laomedon, just like a useless household slave, unable to obtain freedom from his former master; at that time also the walls of Ilium 2.35.2 they rebuilt for the Phrygian. But Homer is not ashamed to show Athena saying to Odysseus, "holding a golden lamp" in her hands; and we have read of Aphrodite, like some wanton little serving-maid, bringing and placing for Helen the stool opposite the adulterer, so that she might lead him to intercourse. 2.35.3 For Panyassis, in addition to these, relates that very many other gods served men, writing somewhat as follows: Demeter endured, and the famous Lame One endured, and Poseidon endured, and Apollo of the silver bow endured to serve a mortal man for a year; and strong-souled Ares endured by the compulsion of his father, and what followed these. 2.36.1 It follows then reasonably from this that these your amorous and passible gods should be introduced in every way as subject to human passions. "For truly their flesh is mortal." And Homer proves this very accurately, by introducing Aphrodite at her wounding, shrieking loud and shrill, and by relating how the most warlike Ares himself was wounded by Diomedes in the flank. 2.36.2 And Polemon says that Athena too was wounded by Ornytus; yes, and Homer says that Aidoneus was shot with an arrow by Heracles, and Panyassis relates the same of Helios [Augeas]. And already this same Panyassis relates that Hera the goddess of marriage was wounded by the same Heracles "in sandy Pylos." And Sosibius says that Heracles too was wounded in the hand by the sons of Hippocoon. 2.36.3 If indeed there are wounds, there is also blood; for the poets' ichors are more repulsive even than blood, for ichor is understood to be the corruption of blood. It is necessary, therefore, to introduce for them both healing and nourishment, 2.36.4 of which they are in need. Therefore there are tables and drunken feasts and laughter and sexual unions, they would not use human pleasures of love, nor beget children, nor indeed sleep, if they were immortal and without need and ageless. 2.36.5 And he even partook of a human table among the Aethiopians, but of an inhuman and lawless one Zeus himself, when feasted by Lycaon the Arcadian; for he was filled with human flesh, though unwillingly. For the god did not know that Lycaon the Arcadian, his host, after slaughtering his own son (Nyctimus was his name) would set him before Zeus as a dish. 2.37.1 A fine Zeus indeed, the prophetic, the hospitable, the protector of suppliants, the gracious, the author of all oracles, the avenger; or rather, <the> unjust, the lawless, the wicked, the impious, the inhuman, the violent, the seducer, the adulterer, the amorous. But he was like that then, when he was such, when he was a man; but now it seems to me your myths too have grown old. 2.37.2 Zeus is no longer a dragon, he is not a swan, not an eagle, not an amorous man; the god does not fly, he does not love boys, he does not kiss, he does not do violence, and yet there are still many beautiful women now, more comely than Leda and in their prime more than Semele, and lads more beautiful 2.37.3 and refined than the Phrygian herdsman. Where now is that eagle? And where is the swan? And where is Zeus himself? He has grown old along with his wing; for surely he does not repent of his amours, nor
μορίου σκευάζεται τρόπον ἐφέζεταί τε τῷ κλάδῳ, τὴν ὑπόσχεσιν 2.34.5 ἐκτελῶν τῷ νεκρῷ. Ὑπόμνημα τοῦ πάθους τούτου μυστικὸν φαλλοὶ κατὰ πόλεις ἀνίστανται ∆ιονύσῳ· "εἰ μὴ γὰρ ∆ιονύσῳ πομπὴν ἐποιοῦντο καὶ ὕμνεον ᾆσμα αἰδοίοισιν, ἀναιδέστατα εἴργαστ' ἄν", φησὶν Ἡράκλειτος, "ωὑτὸς δὲ Ἅιδης καὶ ∆ιόνυσος, ὅτεῳ μαίνονται καὶ ληναΐζουσιν", οὐ διὰ τὴν μέθην τοῦ σώματος, ὡς ἐγὼ οἶμαι, τοσοῦτον ὅσον διὰ τὴν ἐπονείδιστον τῆς ἀσελγείας ἱεροφαντίαν. 2.35.1 Εἰκότως ἄρα οἱ τοιοίδε ὑμῶν θεοὶ δοῦλοι παθῶν γεγονότες, ἀλλὰ καὶ πρὸ τῶν Εἱλώτων καλουμένων τῶν παρὰ Λακεδαιμονίοις δούλειον ὑπεισῆλθεν ζυγὸν Ἀπόλλων Ἀδμήτῳ ἐν Φεραῖς, Ἡρακλῆς ἐν Σάρδεσιν Ὀμφάλῃ, Λαομέδοντι δ' ἐθήτευε Ποσειδῶν καὶ Ἀπόλλων, καθάπερ ἀχρεῖος οἰκέτης, μηδὲ ἐλευθερίας δήπουθεν δυνηθεὶς τυχεῖν παρὰ τοῦ προτέρου δεσπότου· τότε καὶ τὰ Ἰλίου τείχη 2.35.2 ἀνῳκοδομησάτην τῷ Φρυγί. Ὅμηρος δὲ τὴν Ἀθηνᾶν οὐκ αἰσχύνεται παραφαίνειν λέγων τῷ Ὀδυσσεῖ "χρύσεον λύχνον ἔχουσαν" ἐν χεροῖν· τὴν δὲ Ἀφροδίτην ἀνέγνωμεν, οἷον ἀκόλαστόν τι θεραπαινίδιον, παραθεῖναι φέρουσαν τῇ Ἑλένῃ τὸν δίφρον τοῦ μοιχοῦ κατὰ πρόσωπον, ὅπως αὐτὸν εἰς 2.35.3 συνουσίαν ὑπαγάγηται. Πανύασσις γὰρ πρὸς τούτοις καὶ ἄλλους παμπόλλους ἀνθρώποις λατρεῦσαι θεοὺς ἱστορεῖ ὧδέ πως γράφων· τλῆ μὲν ∆ημήτηρ, τλῆ δὲ κλυτὸς Ἀμφιγυήεις, τλῆ δὲ Ποσειδάων, τλῆ δ' ἀργυρότοξος Ἀπόλλων ἀνδρὶ παρὰ θνητῷ θητευέμεν εἰς ἐνιαυτόν· τλῆ δ' ὀβριμόθυμος Ἄρης ὑπὸ πατρὸς ἀνάγκης, καὶ τὰ ἐπὶ τούτοις. 2.36.1 Τούτοις οὖν εἰκότως ἕπεται τοὺς ἐρωτικοὺς ὑμῶν καὶ παθητικοὺς τούτους θεοὺς ἀνθρωποπαθεῖς ἐκ παντὸς εἰσάγειν τρόπου. "Καὶ γάρ θην κείνοις θνητὸς χρώς". Τεκμηριοῖ δὲ Ὅμηρος μάλα ἀκριβῶς, Ἀφροδίτην ἐπὶ τῷτραύματι παρεισάγων ὀξὺ καὶ μέγα ἰάχουσαν αὐτόν τε τὸν πολεμικώτατον Ἄρη ὑπὸ τοῦ ∆ιομήδους κατὰ τοῦ κενεῶνος 2.36.2 οὐτασμένον διηγούμενος. Πολέμων δὲ καὶ τὴν Ἀθηνᾶν ὑπὸ Ὀρνύτου τρωθῆναι λέγει· ναὶ μὴν καὶ τὸν Ἀιδωνέα ὑπὸ Ἡρακλέους τοξευθῆναι Ὅμηρος λέγει καὶ τὸν Ἥλιον[Αὐγέαν] Πανύασσις ἱστορεῖ. Ἤδη δὲ καὶ τὴν Ἥραν τὴν ζυγίαν ἱστορεῖ ὑπὸ τοῦ αὐτοῦ Ἡρακλέους ὁ αὐτὸς οὗτος Πανύασσις "ἐν Πύλῳ ἠμαθόεντι". Σωσίβιος δὲ καὶ τὸν Ἡρακλέα πρὸς τῶν Ἱπποκοωντιδῶν κατὰ τῆς χειρὸς 2.36.3 οὐτασθῆναι λέγει. Εἰ δὴ τραύματα, καὶ αἵματα· οἱ γὰρ ἰχῶρες οἱ ποιητικοὶ εἰδεχθέστεροι καὶ τῶν αἱμάτων, σῆψις γὰρ αἵματος ἰχὼρ νοεῖται. Ἀνάγκη τοίνυν θεραπείας καὶ 2.36.4 τροφὰς παρεισάγειν αὐτοῖς, ὧν εἰσιν ἐνδεεῖς. ∆ιὸ τράπεζαι καὶ μέθαι καὶ γέλωτες καὶ συνουσίαι, οὐκ ἂν ἀφροδισίοις χρωμένων ἀνθρωπίνοις οὐδὲ παιδοποιουμένων οὐδὲ μὴν ὑπνωσσόντων, εἰ ἀθάνατοι καὶ ἀνενδεεῖς καὶ ἀγήρῳ ὑπῆρχον. 2.36.5 Μετέλαβεν δὲ καὶ τραπέζης ἀνθρωπίνης παρὰ τοῖς Αἰθίοψιν, ἀπανθρώπου δὲ καὶ ἀθέσμου αὐτὸς ὁ Ζεὺς παρὰ Λυκάονι τῷ Ἀρκάδι ἑστιώμενος· ἀνθρωπείων γοῦν ἐνεφορεῖτο σαρκῶν οὐχ ἑκών. Ἠγνόει γὰρ ὁ θεὸς ὡς ἄρα Λυκάων ὁ Ἀρκὰς ὁ ἑστιάτωρ αὐτοῦ τὸν παῖδα κατασφάξας τὸν αὑτοῦ (Νύκτιμος ὄνομα αὐτῷ) παραθείη ὄψον τῷ ∆ιί. 2.37.1 Καλός γε ὁ Ζεὺς ὁ μαντικός, ὁ ξένιος, ὁ ἱκέσιος, ὁ μειλίχιος, ὁ πανομφαῖος, ὁ προστροπαῖος· μᾶλλον δὲ <ὁ> ἄδικος, ὁ ἄθεσμος, ὁ ἄνομος, ὁ ἀνόσιος, ὁ ἀπάνθρωπος, ὁ βίαιος, ὁ φθορεύς, ὁ μοιχός, ὁ ἐρωτικός. Ἀλλὰ τότε μὲν ἦν, ὅτε τοιοῦτος ἦν, ὅτε ἄνθρωπος ἦν, νῦν δὲ ἤδη μοι δοκοῦσι 2.37.2 καὶ οἱ μῦθοι ὑμῖν γεγηρακέναι. ∆ράκων ὁ Ζεὺς οὐκέτι, οὐ κύκνος ἐστίν, οὐκ ἀετός, οὐκ ἄνθρωπος ἐρωτικός· οὐχ ἵπταται θεός, οὐ παιδεραστεῖ, οὐ φιλεῖ, οὐ βιάζεται, καίτοι πολλαὶ καὶ καλαὶ καὶ νῦν ἔτι γυναῖκες καὶ Λήδας εὐπρε πέστεραι καὶ Σεμέλης ἀκμαιότεραι, μειράκια δὲ ὡραιότερα 2.37.3 καὶ πολιτικώτερα τοῦ Φρυγίου βουκόλου. Ποῦ νῦν ἐκεῖνος ὁ ἀετός; Ποῦ δὲ ὁ κύκνος; Ποῦ δὲ αὐτὸς ὁ Ζεύς; Γεγήρακε μετὰ τοῦ πτεροῦ· οὐ γὰρ δήπου μετανοεῖ τοῖς ἐρωτικοῖς οὐδὲ