John Chrysostom, On Virginity

she maintains with good rhythm, and she neither allows her tongue to utter anything discordant and unharmonious nor her eye only to look shamelessly and suspiciously nor her hearing to receive any unfitting melodies. And she also takes care of her feet so as not to walk disorderly and effeminately but to have a gait that is unaffected and unstudied. And having cut away adornment from her clothing, she also continuously advises her face not to be dissolved in laughter nor even to smile gently but always to display a modest and severe brow and to be prepared for tears at all times, but never for laughter.

64 That what is suffered for Christ, even if it is grievous, has pleasure. When you hear of tears, do not suspect anything gloomy. For those tears have as much pleasure as not even the laughter of this world. But if you disbelieve, hear Luke saying that "the apostles departed from the presence of the council, having been flogged, rejoicing"; and yet the nature of scourges is not such; for it is accustomed to work not pleasure and joy but pain and trouble. But while the nature of scourges is not such, faith in Christ is such as to overcome the very nature of things. If scourges produced pleasure because of Christ, why do you wonder if tears also work the same thing for the same reason? For this reason, the way He called narrow and afflicted, this He again calls a good yoke and a light burden. For by its nature the matter is such, but by the choice of those who succeed and by their good hopes it becomes exceedingly light. Wherefore, one might see those who have chosen the narrow and afflicted way journeying with more eagerness than the spacious and broad, not because they are not afflicted but because they are superior to the afflictions and suffer nothing from them, as is likely for others. For this life also has afflictions, but when we compare them to those of marriage, they should not even be called afflictions.

65 That all the labors of virginity are not a counterweight to the birth pangs of marriage alone. For what, tell me, does the virgin endure throughout her whole life such as the married woman endures, so to speak, each year, being torn by birth pangs and groans? For so great is the tyranny of this pain that the divine scripture, whenever it wishes to allude to captivity and famine and pestilence and the unbearable evils, calls all such things birth pangs. And God imposed this on woman as a punishment and a curse, I do not mean the bearing of children but the bearing of children thus with pains and birth pangs; "For in sorrows," he says, "you will bear children." But the virgin stands above this birth pang and curse. For He who loosed the curse of the law loosed this one also with that one.

66 That to walk is more pleasant than to be carried about on mules. But to be carried about in the marketplace on mules is pleasant. This is only excessive vanity, but it is deprived of all pleasure. And just as darkness is not better than light, nor being confined than being free, nor needing many things than needing nothing, so too will she not be better off not using her own feet. For I pass over how many annoyances it is necessary to endure from these things. For she is not able to leave her house whenever she wishes, but often, even when a useful departure is pressing, she is forced to stay at home, just like beggars whose feet have been cut off and have no means to be carried. And if the husband happens to have occupied the mules, there is faintheartedness and strife and much silent anger; but if she herself, foreseeing none of the future things, does this same thing, having let her husband go, she turns her anger against herself, continually gnawing at herself from the vexation. And how much better it was to use her feet—for God made them for us for this reason—and endure none of these terrible things than, wishing to be delicate, to have so many griefs and faintheartednesses

εὐρυθμίᾳ διατηρεῖ, καὶ οὔτε τὴν γλῶτταν ἀφίησιν ἀπηχές τι καὶ ἀνάρμοστον φθέγξασθαι οὔτε τὸν ὀφθαλμὸν μόνον ἀναισχύντως καὶ ὑπόπτως ἐνιδεῖν οὔτε τὴν ἀκοὴν δέξασθαί τι τῶν οὐ προσηκόντων μελῶν. Καὶ ποδῶν δὲ αὐτῇ μέλει ὥστε μὴ ἄτακτα βαδίζειν καὶ διατεθρυμμένα ἀλλ' ἄπλαστόν τινα καὶ ἀνεπιτήδευτον ἔχειν τὴν βάδισιν. Καὶ τὸν ἀπὸ τῶν ἱματίων δὲ καλλωπισμὸν περικόψασα καὶ τῷ προσώπῳ παραινεῖ συνεχῶς μὴ διαχεῖσθαι τῷ γέλωτι ἀλλὰ μηδὲ ἠρέμα μειδιᾶν ἀλλ' ἐπισκύνιον αἰδέσιμον ἀεὶ καὶ αὐστηρὸν ἐπιδείκνυσθαι καὶ πρὸς δάκρυα παρεσκευάσθαι διὰ παντός, πρὸς γέλωτα δὲ μηδέποτε.

64 Ὅτι ἃ διὰ τὸν Χριστὸν πασχόμενα, κἂν ἀνιαρὰ ᾖ, ἡδονὴν ἔχει. Ὅταν δὲ δακρύων ἀκούσῃς μηδὲν ὑποπτεύσῃς σκυθρωπόν. Τοσαύτην γὰρ ἔχει τὰ δάκρυα ἐκεῖνα τὴν ἡδονὴν ὅσην οὐδὲ ὁ γέλως τοῦ κόσμου τούτου. Εἰ δὲ ἀπιστεῖς, ἄκουσον τοῦ Λουκᾶ λέγοντος ὅτι «Μαστιχθέντες οἱ ἀπόστολοι ἀνεχώρουν ἀπὸ προσώπου τοῦ συνεδρίου χαίροντες»· καίτοι γε οὐ τοιαύτη τῶν μαστίγων ἡ φύσις· οὐ γὰρ ἡδονὴν καὶ χαρὰν ἀλλ' ὀδύνην καὶ κόπον ἐργάζεσθαι εἴωθεν. Ἀλλ' ἡ μὲν τῶν μαστίγων φύσις οὐ τοιαύτη, ἡ δὲ εἰς τὸν Χριστὸν πίστις τοιαύτη ὡς καὶ τῆς φύσεως αὐτῆς τῶν πραγμάτων κρατεῖν. Εἰ δὲ μάστιγες ἡδονὴν ἔτεκον διὰ τὸν Χριστόν, τί θαυμάζεις εἰ καὶ τὰ δάκρυα τὸ αὐτὸ ἐργάζεται διὰ τὸν αὐτόν; ∆ιὰ τοῦτο ἣν στενὴν καὶ τεθλιμμένην ἐκάλεσεν ὁδὸν ταύτην πάλιν καλεῖ καὶ ζυγὸν χρηστὸν καὶ φορτίον ἐλαφρόν. Τῇ μὲν γὰρ φύσει τὸ πρᾶγμα τοιοῦτόν ἐστι, τῇ δὲ τῶν κατορθούντων προαιρέσει καὶ ταῖς ἐλπίσι ταῖς χρησταῖς σφόδρα γίνεται κοῦφον. ∆ιὸ ἀντὶ τῆς εὐρυχώρου καὶ πλατείας τὴν στενὴν καὶ τεθλιμμένην μετὰ πλείονος ἄν τις ἴδοι προθυμίας ὁδεύοντας τοὺς ἑλομένους αὐτήν, οὐ διὰ τὸ μὴ θλίβεσθαι ἀλλὰ διὰ τὸ τῶν θλίψεων ἀνωτέρους εἶναι καὶ μηδὲν πάσχειν ὑπ' αὐτῶν, οἷον καὶ τοὺς ἄλλους εἰκός. Ἔχει μὲν γὰρ θλίψεις καὶ οὗτος ὁ βίος ἀλλ' ὅταν αὐτὰς πρὸς τὰς τοῦ γάμου παραβάλωμεν οὐδὲ θλίψεις χρὴ καλεῖν.

65 Ὅτι πάντα τὰ ἐπίπονα τῆς παρθενίας τῶν ὠδίνων μόνων τοῦ γάμου οὐκ ἔστιν ἀντίρροπα. Τί γάρ, εἰπέ μοι, παρὰ πάντα τὸν βίον ἡ παρθένος ὑπομένει τοιοῦτον οἷον καθ' ἕκαστον ὡς εἰπεῖν ἐνιαυτὸν ἡ γεγαμημένη, ὠδῖσι καὶ οἰμωγαῖς διακοπτομένη; Τοσαύτη γὰρ τῆς ἀλγηδόνος ταύτης ἡ τυραννὶς ὡς καὶ τὴν θείαν γραφὴν ἡνίκα ἂν αἰχμαλωσίαν καὶ λιμὸν καὶ λοιμὸν καὶ τὰ ἀφόρητα τῶν κακῶν αἰνίττεσθαι βούληται, ὠδῖνας πάντα τὰ τοιαῦτα καλεῖν. Καὶ ὁ Θεὸς δὲ ἀντὶ τιμωρίας αὐτὸ καὶ ἀρᾶς ἐπέθηκε τῇ γυναικί, οὐ τὸ τίκτειν λέγω ἀλλὰ τὸ οὕτω τίκτειν μετὰ πόνων καὶ ὠδίνων· «Ἐν λύπαις γάρ», φησί, «τέξῃ τέκνα.» Ἡ δὲ παρθένος ἀνωτέρω ταύτης ἕστηκε τῆς ὠδῖνος καὶ τῆς ἀρᾶς. Ὁ γὰρ τὴν ἀπὸ τοῦ νόμου κατάραν λύσας καὶ ταύτην ἔλυσε μετ' ἐκείνης.

66 Ὅτι τὸ βαδίζειν τοῦ περιφέρεσθαι ἐπὶ ἡμιόνοις ἥδιον. Ἀλλὰ τὸ περιφέρεσθαι ἐπὶ τῆς ἀγορᾶς ἐπὶ ἡμιόνων ἡδύ. Τῦφος τοῦτο περιττὸς μόνον, ἡδονῆς δὲ ἀπεστέρηται πάσης. Καὶ ὥσπερ οὔτε σκότος τοῦ φωτὸς ἄμεινον οὔτε τὸ συγκεκλεῖσθαι τοῦ λελύσθαι οὔτε τὸ πολλῶν χρῄζειν τοῦ μηδενός, οὕτως οὐδὲ αὐτὴ τοῖς οἰκείοις ποσὶ μὴ κεχρημένη ἄμεινον διακείσεται. Τὰς γὰρ ἀηδίας ὅσας ἐκ τούτων ὑπομένειν ἀνάγκη παρίημι. Καὶ γὰρ οὐχ ὅτε βούλεται ἔξεστιν αὐτῇ τῆς οἰκίας προελθεῖν, ἀλλὰ καὶ πολλάκις χρησίμου τινὸς κατεπειγούσης ἐξόδου οἴκοι μένειν ἀναγκάζεται, καθάπερ τῶν ἐπαιτῶν οἱ τοὺς πόδας ἀποτετμημένοι καὶ οὐκ ἔχοντες ὅτῳ φέροιντο. Κἂν μὲν ὁ ἀνὴρ τύχῃ τὰς ἡμιόνους ἀπασχολήσας μικροψυχία καὶ μάχη καὶ πολλὴ παρασιώπησις· ἂν δὲ αὐτὴ μηδὲν τῶν μελλόντων προορωμένη τὸ αὐτὸ τοῦτο ἐργάσηται, τὸν ἄνδρα ἀφεῖσα καθ' ἑαυτῆς τρέπει τὸν θυμόν, διατρώγουσα συνεχῶς ὑπὸ τῆς ἐπηρείας ἑαυτήν. Καὶ πόσῳ βέλτιον ἦν τοῖς ποσὶ κεχρημένην-διὰ γὰρ τοῦτο ἡμῖν αὐτοὺς ἐποίησεν ὁ Θεός-μηδὲν τούτων ὑπομένειν τῶν δεινῶν ἢ βουλομένην θρύπτεσθαι τοσαύτας ἔχειν λύπης καὶ μικροψυχίας