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to leap out (the Blue was driven by Constantine the Logothete, father of Thomas the Patrician who had also been Logothete of the Drome; the White was driven by Cheilas, and the Red by Crasas; for the protoasekretis had no time to spare, nor did the protonotary of the drome, but the one was the combographer for the Blues, the other for the Greens)-as they were standing on the chariot in their charioteer's garb, and a message arrived that Amer was terribly overrunning and plundering the Thracesian theme and was approaching Malagina and that terrible things were expected any moment, and 199 at this the protonotary grew gloomy and reported with dejection the reply from the Domestic of the Schools, at the same time bringing and showing the letters in his hands, "With what," he said, "you there, audacity do you dare to discuss such matters with me during this critical race, when my only concern is whether I might see the middle horse on the left stumble? For which my whole struggle is." 37 And it was not that he was captured by this desire, or if you will, passion, and was free from other more unseemly things, but in immoderately pursuing a moderate custom, he fell from what was fitting and especially from imperial honor. and once, meeting on the road a poor woman, whose son he had adopted, coming from the bath and holding her own water-jar in her hands, he threw himself from his horse, sent away all the others of the senate who were following him to the palace there, and befriending some licentious and secret little men, he went off with the woman, having taken the jar from her hands, and "Come now, woman, be brave," he said, "and receive me at your house, for I have a craving for coarse bread and fresh cheese." for one must repeat his very words. And since the woman was speechless at the strange sight and was at a loss for everything, having neither a table nor its adornments, Michael, turning quicker than words, took the towel which he brought from 200 the bath, still wet, and using it in place of the fine cloth that is laid on the table, and taking the woman's key, he was everything himself: emperor, table-setter, cook, and guest. And emptying out what that poor woman's chest held, he feasted on this and dined with her, referring the imitation to my Christ and God. And from there he went again on foot to the palace, condemning the former emperors for much foolishness and arrogance and pride; had they heard this nonsense, they would have said, "But you should not have been doing these things while living in luxury and playing, and condemning our pride, but while fighting at the forefront and lacking necessities and being a comrade-in-arms and lover of the soldiers, not of tavern women and wicked wretches." All these things therefore made Michael hated and stirred the most just wrath of God. 38 And what was more difficult, the band of men he had with him, these were certain Satyrs and licentious in every shameful act; one might well have called them worshippers of Dionysus. Whom he held in honor and reverence, disregarding divine things, and he put on them gold-embroidered priestly vestments and omophoria, and in other ways compelled them to perform the holy rites indecently and impurely, and he called their leader, named Gryllus, the patriarch, and the other eleven metropolitans of the choice and 201 splendid thrones, with whom if he did not himself associate, he did not deign to rule; whence this man of Coloneia was called and is named president. And since they had to sing and perform the mysteries, they would perform the odes with a cithara, now echoing somehow gently and clearly, imitating the mystical chants, now with unrestrained and piercing force, supposedly the exclamations of the priests. And filling vessels of gold and set with pearls with vinegar and mustard, to those whom they wished

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ἐκπηδᾶν (ἐπάτει δὲ βένετος, καὶ πράσινος ὁ λογοθέτης Κωνσταντῖνος, ὁ πατρικίου Θωμᾶ καὶ γεγονότος λογο- θέτου τοῦ δρόμου πατήρ, λευκὸς δὲ ὁ Χειλᾶς καὶ ῥούσιος ὁ Κρα- σᾶς· οὐκ ην δὲ οὐδὲ τῷ πρωτοασηκρῆτις σχολάζειν, ωσπερ οὐδὲ τῷ πρωτονοταρίῳ τοῦ δρόμου, ἀλλ' ὁ μὲν ην κομβινογράφος τῶν βενέτων, ὁ δὲ τῶν πρασίνων)-αὐτῶν ουν ἐφ' αρματος ἱσταμένων μετὰ καὶ τῆς ἡνιοχικῆς στολῆς, καὶ ἐπαγγελίας φθασάσης οτι δει- νῶς ὁ Αμερ κατατρέχει τε καὶ κατασύρει τὸ Θρᾳκήσιον καὶ τοῖς Μαλαγίνοις πλησιάζει καὶ προσδοκῶνται οσον οὐδέπω δεινά, καὶ 199 ἐπὶ τούτῳ στυγνάσαντος μὲν τοῦ πρωτονοταρίου, ἀπαγγείλαντος δὲ μετὰ κατηφείας τὴν ἐκ τοῦ δομεστίκου τῶν σχολῶν ἀπόκρισιν καὶ αμα ἐπὶ χεῖρας τὰ γράμματα φέροντός τε καὶ δεικνύοντος, "τίνι" φησίν, "ω ουτος, τόλμῃ χρησάμενος τοιαῦτα κατὰ τὸν ἀναγκαῖον τοῦτον ἀγῶνά μοι διαλέγειν ἐπιχειρεῖς, τοῦτο μόνον σπουδάζοντι, εἰ μὴ τὸν μέσον εὐώνυμον ἰδεῖν παρατετραμμένον; ὑπὲρ ου μοι πᾶς ὁ ἀγών." 37 Καὶ οὐχὶ μὲν τούτῳ τῷ πόθῳ, η εἰ βούλει γε, πάθει ἡλίσκετο, ἑτέρων δὲ ἀπρεπεστέρων ἐκτὸς ην, ἀλλὰ καὶ μέτριον ηθος ἀμέτρως καταδιώκων ἐξέπιπτε τοῦ πρέποντος καὶ τῆς βασιλικῆς τιμῆς τὰ μάλιστα. καί ποτε γυναίῳ, ης τὸν παῖδα υἱοθετησά- μενος ην, κατὰ τὴν ὁδὸν συντυχὼν ἐκ βαλανείου μὲν ἐρχομένῃ τὴν ἑαυτῆς δὲ κάλπιν ἐπὶ χεῖρας ἐχούσῃ, ἐκ τοῦ ιππου ἀπορριφεὶς τοὺς μὲν αλλους οσοι ἐκ τῆς συγκλήτου τούτῳ ἐπηκολούθουν κατὰ τὰ ἐκεῖσε οντα ἀνάκτορα ἐξαπέστειλεν, ἀκόλαστα δέ τινα καὶ μυ- στικὰ ἀνδράρια ἑταιρισάμενος ἀπῄει μετὰ τῆς γυναικός, τὴν κάλ- πιν τῶν ἐκείνης χειρῶν ἀναλαβών, καὶ "αγε δή, ω γύναι, θαρροῦ- σα" ἐπέλεξεν "ἐμὲ κατὰ τὸ οικημά σου ἀπόδεξαι, ψωμοῦ πιτυρώ- δους εφεσιν εχοντα καὶ ἀσβεστοτύρου." δεῖ γὰρ τὴν ἐκείνου λέξιν εἰπεῖν. ἐπεὶ δὲ τῷ ξένῳ τοῦ θεάματος ἡ γυνὴ ην ἐνεὸς καὶ πάντων ἠπόρει, μήτε μὴν τράπεζαν μήτε τὰ ταύτης στολίζοντα εχουσα, ὁ Μιχαὴλ θᾶττον η λόγος ειχε στραφείς, τὸ ο εφερε σάβανον ἐκ 200 τοῦ βαλανείου ετι διάβροχον ον λαβών, ἀντὶ λεπτῆς ὀθόνης, η τῇ τραπέζῃ ἐπίκειται, χρησάμενος, καὶ τὴν κλεῖδα τῆς γυναικὸς ἀφε- λὼν αὐτὸς ην τὰ πάντα, βασιλεύς, τραπεζοποιός, μάγειρος, δαι- τυμών. ἐκβαλὼν δὲ τὰ α ειχεν τῆς πενιχρᾶς ἐκείνης ἡ κιβωτός, εἱστιᾶτο ταύτῃ καὶ συνεδείπνει, τὴν μίμησιν πρὸς τὸν ἐμὸν ἀνα- φέρων Χριστὸν καὶ θεόν. κἀκεῖθεν βάδην αυθις ἀπῄει πρὸς τὰ ἀνάκτορα, πολλῆς εὐηθείας καὶ ἀλαζονείας καὶ τύφου καταγινώ- σκων τῶν πρὸ τοῦ βασιλέων· ου ἐκεῖνοι λήρου εἰ ηκουσαν, "ἀλλ' οὐκ αλλως τρυφῶντα καὶ παίζοντα ταῦτα" εφησαν "ἐχρῆν σε ποι- εῖν καὶ τὸν ἡμέτερον τύφον καταγινώσκειν, ἀλλὰ προπολεμοῦντα καὶ τῶν ἀναγκαίων σπανίζοντα καὶ τοῖς στρατιώταις σύνδειπνον οντα καὶ ἐραστήν, ἀλλ' οὐ γυναίων καπηλίδων καὶ μοχθηρῶν." ταῦτ' ουν απαντα μισητόν τε ἐποίει τὸν Μιχαὴλ καὶ τὴν τοῦ θεοῦ ἐκίνει δικαιοτάτην ὀργήν. 38 Καὶ τὸ δὴ χαλεπώτερον, ἡ τῶν ων ειχε μεθ' ἑαυτοῦ φρατρία, Σατυροί τινες ουτοι καὶ πρὸς πᾶσαν αἰσχρουργίαν ἀκό- λαστοι· ειπεν αν τις αὐτοὺς θιασώτας ειναι ∆ιονύσου καλῶς. ους ἐκεῖνος διὰ τιμῆς αγων τε καὶ αἰδοῦς, τῶν θείων κατολιγωρῶν, ἱερατικὰς στολὰς χρυσοϋφάντους τε ἐπετίθει καὶ ὠμοφόρια, καὶ αλλως ἠνάγκαζεν ἀσχημόνως τε καὶ ἀνάγνως τελεῖν τὰ ἁγνά, καὶ πατριάρχην τὸν εξαρχον τούτων ἐκάλει, ουτω Γρῦλον καλούμενον, τοὺς δὲ λοιποὺς ενδεκα μητροπολίτας τῶν ἐξαιρέτων θρόνων τε 201 καὶ λαμπρῶν, οις εἰ μὴ καὶ αὐτὸς ἐκοινώνει, οὐδὲ βασιλεύειν ἠξίου· οθεν ὁ Κωλωνείας ουτος ἐλέγετό τε καὶ ὀνομάζεται πρόεδρος. ἐπεὶ δὲ καὶ ᾳδειν ἐχρῆν αὐτοὺς καὶ τελεῖν τὰ μυστήρια, τὰς μὲν ᾠδὰς ἐξεπλήρουν διὰ κιθάρας, νῦν μὲν ἠρέμα πως ουτω καὶ λιγυ- ρῶς ἐπηχοῦντες, τὰ μυστικὰ μιμούμενοι, νῦν δὲ ἀνέτῳ φορᾷ καὶ διαπρυσίῳ, τὰς ἐκφωνήσεις δῆθεν τῶν ἱερέων. καὶ σκεύη δὲ διά- χρυσα καὶ ἐκ μαργάρων συγκείμενα οξους τε καὶ σινήπεως ἐκπλη- ροῦντες τοῖς οις ἐβούλοντο