114

having seen desolation and helplessness and affliction and pain, he will weep in the pain of his soul and will cry out in despair to the Almighty Lord.

"Behold, you see, O Lord, and there is nothing that you do not see; I am the work of your hands, but the works of your commandments I have not done, but I have pursued every wickedness in foolishness. You are good, but I did not know you; but now I have heard of you and I have trembled, and what I shall do, I do not know. I have perceived your judgment, and a word of defense has not been found in my mouth. For I have done nothing on earth worthy of one idle word from my mouth, (305) because if a man does all righteousness, he does it as a slave and as a debtor, but he will find no exchange for his sin, for mercy is with you. For sin is death, and who will be the one dying through it and rising by himself? Certainly no one. For you alone, having died, arose, because you committed no sin, nor was deceit found in your mouth. But who will die in sins and not repent? But there will be no benefit for him. Thus, O Almighty Master, I too repent for having done evil works, but repentance is not a justification for me; for repentance is the knowledge of sin. And now you see, all-seeing Lord, that I have nothing except the body, but there is no benefit to me from the deprivation of wealth. For I am one whole wound and nowhere is an occasion for salvation left for me, because I was left alone and Hades swallowed me alive. And you, O Lord, see; you alone are able to lead me up and to heal the pain of my heart, because your hand is powerful for all things and reaches the ends of the abysses, accomplishing all things by your nod. To say 'Have mercy on me' I do not dare, for I am unworthy; but you, O Lord, see.

The compassionate God, therefore, will quickly hearken to him and will swiftly grant him rest from pain and release from the suffering of his heart. For, being a lover of mankind, He does not bear to see the work of his hands in such distress and unbearable pain, and He will show to that man, who has done all the aforesaid things without omission, (306) and to those who hear in faith and are about to imitate this true image and account of repentance which action first fulfilled and then word delivered to writing, His great and ineffable mercy, and He will pour out His goodness upon him and will change his pain into joy and will transform the bitterness of his heart into sweet new wine and will cause the devouring venom of the serpent to be vomited from his inward parts; and from then on he will not remember his former pains, nor all those evils which he endured, nor will he, turning back, seek money or possessions or wealth, which he left behind at the time of the blow of his repentance, nor will he desire anything else. For the most high God will give him health, which will be above all the treasures of the earth, and health will create an ineffable joy in his heart, and the joy in his heart will be tenfold more than his former affliction, and this joy in turn will drive away every pain occurring externally in his body, and that man will know that the wounds of his body no longer come upon his heart from then on, and external affliction will not touch the joy that is in his heart, and this knowledge will be an increase of the joy that is in his heart.

And his neighbors will be, those formerly observing his external afflictions, but ignorant of the secret joy that came to him after these things, (307) groaning over him and saying: "Behold a man who has known no gladness in his life, and his life is full of affliction and pain, and his days are no different from those being scourged and punished for sins"; but he alone knowing that the time of his life is full of delight and exultation and the joy of his heart scoffs at death and Hades has no dominion over it, because it knows no end, that man rejoices in these things ten thousand times more than all the kings who

114

ἐρημίαν καί ἀπορίαν καί θλῖψιν καί ὀδύνην θεασάμενος, κλαύσει ἐν ὀδύνῃ ψυχῆς αὐτοῦ καί βοήσει ἐν ἀπογνώσει πρός τόν Παντοκράτορα Κύριον.

"Ἰδού ὁρᾷς, Κύριε, καί ἔστιν οὐδέν ὅ οὐ βλέπεις, ἐγώ δέ σῶν χειρῶν ἔργον, ἔργα δέ σῶν προσταγμάτων οὐκ ἔπραξα, πᾶσαν δέ κακίαν μετῆλθον ἐν ἀφροσύνῃ. Σύ ἀγαθός, ἐγώ δέ οὐκ ἐγίνωσκόν σε, νυνί δέ ἀκήκοα περί σοῦ καί ἔφριξα καί τί ποιήσω οὐκ οἶδα. Ἠσθήθην τῆς κρίσεώς σου καί λόγος ἀπολογίας οὐχ εὑρέθη ἐν τῷ στόματί μου. Ἑνός γάρ λόγου ἀργοῦ στόματός μου ἀντάξιον οὐδέν διεπραξάμην ἐπί τῆς γῆς, (305) ὅτι ἐάν πᾶσαν δικαιοσύνην ποιήσῃ ἄνθρωπος, ὡς δοῦλος καί ὡς ὀφειλέτης ποιήσει, ἀντάλλαγμα δέ ἁμαρτίας αὐτοῦ οὐδέν εὑρήσει, τό γάρ ἔλεος παρά σοί ἐστιν, ἁμαρτία γάρ θάνατος, καί τίς ἔσται ὁ δι᾿ αὐτῆς ἀποθνῄσκων καί ἀφ΄ ἑαυτοῦ ἀνιστάμενος; Πάντως οὐδείς. Σύ γάρ μόνος ἀποθανών ἀνέστης, ὅτι ἁμαρτίαν οὐκ ἐποίησας οὐδέ ἐν τῷ στόματί σου εὑρέθη δόλος. Τίς δέ ἀποθανεῖται ἐν ἀμαρτίαις καί οὐ μεταμεληθήσεται; Ἔσται δέ αὐτῷ οὐδέν ὄφελος. Οὕτως , ∆έσποτα Παντοκράτορ, καί ἐγώ μετανοῶ μέν κακά διαπραξάμενος ἔργα, οὐκ ἔστι μοι δέ εἰς δικαίωμα ἡ μετάνοια· μετάνοια γάρ ἐπίγνωσίς ἐστιν ἁμαρτίας. Καί νῦν βλέπεις, παντεπόπτα Κύριε, ὅτι οὐδέν ἔχω πλήν τοῦ σώματος, ἀλλ᾿ οὐδέν μοι ὄφελος ἐξ τῆς τοῦ πλούτου στερήσεως. Ὅλος γάρ εἰμι τραῦμα ἕν καί οὐδαμοῦ μοι περιλέλειπται ἀφορμή σωτηρίας, ὅτι κατελείφθην μόνος καί ζῶντά με ᾅδης κατέπιε. Καί σύ, Κύριε, βλέπεις, μόνος δύνασαί με ἀναγαγεῖν καί τόν πόνον τῆς ἐμῆς καρδίας ἰάσασθαι, ὅτι δυνατή ἡ χείρ σου εἰς ἅπαντα καί τά τέλη φθάνουσα τῶν ἀβύσσων, ἐνεργοῦσα πάντα τῷ νεύματί σου. Εἰπεῖν "Ἐλέησόν με" οὐ τολμῶ, ἀνάξιος γάρ εἰμι· σύ δέ, Κύριε, βλέπεις.

Ὁ οὖν εὔσπλαγχνος Θεός ταχέως εἰσακούσεται αὐτοῦ καί ἀνάπαυσιν ὀδύνης καί ἀπαλλαγήν πόνου καρδίας αὐτοῦ συντόμως παράσχῃ αὐτῷ. Φιλάνθρωπος γάρ ὤν, οὐ φέρει ἐν ἀνάγκῃ τοιαύτῃ καί ἀφορήτῳ ὀδύνῃ τό τῶν χειρῶν αὐτοῦ ποίημα καθορᾶν, καί ποιήσει μετά τοῦ ἀνθρώπου ἐκείνου, τοῦ τά προειρημένα ἅπαντα ἀπαραλείπτως ποιήσαντος, (306) καί μετά τῶν ἐν πίστει ἀκουόντων καί μιμεῖσθαι μελλόντων τήν ἀληθῆ ταύτην τῆς μετανοίας εἰκόνα καί ἱστορίαν ἥν πρῶτον ἐξεπλήρωσε πρᾶξις καί τότε γραφῇ παραδέδωκε λόγος, τό πολύ καί ἄφατον ἔλεος αὐτοῦ, καί ἐκχέει τήν αὐτοῦ καί ἐπ᾿ αὐτόν ἀγαθότητα καί μεταβαλεῖ εἰς χαράν τόν πόνον αὐτοῦ καί τήν πικρίαν τῆς καρδίας αὐτοῦ εἰς γλυκύ γλεῦκος μεταποιήσει καί τόν κατεσθίοντα ἰόν τοῦ δράκοντος τά ἐντόσθια αὐτοῦ ἐξεμέσαι ποιήσει· καί οὐ μνησθήσεται ἔκτοτε τῶν πρώην πόνων αὐτοῦ, οὔτε πάντων ἐκείνων ὧν ὑπέστη κακῶν, ἀλλ᾿ οὐδέ χρήματα ἤ κτήματα ἤ πλοῦτον, ὅν κετέλιπεν ἐν τῷ καιρῷ τῆς πληγῆς τῆς μετανοίας αὐτοῦ, ἐπιστραφείς ζητήσει ἤ τινος ἑτέρου ἐπιθυμήσει. Ὁ γάρ ὕψιστος Θεός δώσει αὐτῷ ὑγείαν, ἥτις ἔσται ὑπέρ πάντας τούς θησαυρούς τῆς γῆς, ἡ δέ ὑγεία χαράν ἐμποιήσει ἄφραστον ἐν τῇ καρδίᾳ αὐτοῦ, καί ἔσται ἡ χαρά ἐν τῇ καρδίᾳ αὐτοῦ δεκαπλασίως ὑπέρ τήν προτέραν θλῖψιν αὐτοῦ, καί αὕτη πάλιν ἡ χαρά πάντα πόνον τόν ἔξωθεν γινόμενον ἐν τῷ σώματι αὐτοῦ ἀποδιώξει, καί ἔσται γινώσκων ὁ ἄνθρωπος ἐκεῖνος ὅτι τραύματα σώματος αὐτοῦ οὐδέ ἔρχεται ἔκτοτε ἐπί καρδίαν αὐτοῦ, καί θλῖψις ἡ ἔξωθεν οὐ καθάψεται τῆς χαρᾶς τῆς οὔσης ἐν τῇ καρδίᾳ αὐτοῦ, καί αὕτη ἡ γνῶσις ἔσται πλεονασμός τῆς χαρᾶς τῆς ἐν τῇ καρδίᾳ αὐτοῦ.

Καί ἔσονται οἱ πλησίον αὐτοῦ, οἱ πρώην θεωροῦντες τάς ἔξωθεν θλίψεις αὐτοῦ, ἀγνοοῦντες δέ τήν μετά ταῦτα γεγονυῖαν κρυφίαν χαράν αὐτοῦ, (307) στενάζοντες ἐπ᾿ αὐτῷ καί λέγοντες· "Ἴδε ἄνθρωπος ὅς οὐκ οἶδεν εὐφροσύνην ἐν τῇ ζωῇ αὐτοῦ, καί ὁ βίος αὐτοῦ θλίψεως καί ὀδύνης πλήρης, καί αἱ ἡμέραι αὐτοῦ οὐδέν διαφέρουσι τῶν μαστιζομένων και τιμωρουμένων ἐπί ἁμαρτίαις"· εἰδώς δέ μόνος ἐκεῖνος ὅτι πλήρης θυμηδίας καί ἀγαλλιάσεως ὁ χρόνος αὐτοῦ τῆς ζωῆς καί ἡ χαρά τῆς καρδίας αὐτοῦ θάνατον ἐμπαίζει καί ᾅδης οὐ κυριεύει αὐτῆς, ὅτι τέλος οὐκ οἶδε, χαίρει ὁ ἄνθρωπος ἐκεῖνος ἐπί τούτοις μυριοπλασίως ὑπέρ πάντας τούς βασιλεῖς τούς