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God, to the upright in heart. But my feet were almost shaken, my steps were nearly poured out, because I was zealous over the lawless." It is the persona of one repenting. What the repenting persona says is not reported from the disposition of one pretending to repent; I knew that "how good God is to Israel, to the upright in heart" He does what He does. But I, who was still unsteady—he now introduces the one repenting—was almost shaken and fell. And I say something apostolic consonant with this: "We know that the law is spiritual"—we who are perfect, the disciples of the Spirit, who have received the divine and spiritual law—. "But I am of the flesh, sold under sin." It is not the one who knows that the law is spiritual who is of the flesh, sold under sin; for he distinguished himself from them. "We know that the law is spiritual," he says generally about the saints. "But I am of the flesh, sold under sin." And this very short phrase suggests many doctrines: "I am of the flesh"; not by nature, not by constitution am I such, but "sold under sin." But he who is sold under some master in order to become so, is not of the flesh by nature; for his condition has come to be so from being sold. And here: "How good God is to Israel, to the upright in heart. But my feet were almost shaken," that is, of the soul. And this "almost" shows that he has not been shaken at all; for he who says: "I was almost slain," shows that he was not slain. "My steps were nearly poured out." I was running well, I was walking as I ought, I was taking straight steps. But these were almost poured out. And they are poured out when the runner checks his course and turns back. And consider it indeed from the phrase itself: take for me someone ascending to a high, sandy place. Therefore, having seen the shaking of my feet and not yet a fall, they boasted against me, they have spoken words of arrogance. One might say in another saying: "Do not rejoice over me, my enemy, because I have fallen; I will arise." But the one now speaking did not fall at all, but only his feet were shaken; for if he who has fallen rises and leaves behind the gloating of the enemy, much more he who has not even fallen. It is easier to stand and plant the feet when one is shaken than to rise after having fallen. If, then, the difficult thing happens, much more is the easy thing quickly accomplished. 18 For I am ready for scourges. Even though I have been in motion and my strength has left me and the light of my eyes was not with me and my feet were shaken, I am ready for scourges; for I do not refuse to be scourged by you, as you discipline a beloved son. "Do not make light of the Lord's discipline; for the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he scourges every son whom he receives." Since, therefore, I am a son, even if I have gathered for myself causes for scourges, I refuse to be boasted against by them, as if they were overthrowing me. But I am ready to be scourged by you. 18 And my pain is before me continually. I am in pain because I have been among those who bring punishment, among those who bring scourges. He who sorrows with the "godly sorrow" that brings "repentance that leads to salvation" has the pain before him always. Just as he who has a dead person and mourns him, weeps as long as he sees him, so he who has come to be among those who bring pain mourns and weeps as long as he sees them and has the pain before him continually. For instance, someone has come to have an incurable disease; from the pain of this disease he has pain before him. If some physician or God's help circumscribes the disease that is the cause of the pain, he immediately casts off the pain and says: "You have turned my mourning into joy for me." And he says that: "the Lord heard and had mercy on me." And that I may speak more clearly: Lazarus the brother of Mary and Martha had died, and while he was dead, they were grieving and into

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θεός, τοῖς εὐθέσι τῇ καρδίᾳ. ἐμοῦ δὲ παρὰ μικρὸν ἐσαλεύθησαν οἱ πόδες, παρ' ὀλίγον ἐξεχύθη τὰ διαβήματά μου, ὅτι ἐζήλωσα ἐπὶ τοῖς ἀνόμοις". πρόσωπόν ἐστιν μετανοῦντος. οὐχ ἃ λέγει τὸ μετανοοῦν πρόσωπον ἀπὸ τῆς διαθέσεως τοῦ προσποιησαμένου μετανοεῖν ἀπαγγέλλεται· ἔγνων ὅτι "ὡς ἀγαθὸς ὁ θεὸς τοῦ Ἰσραὴλ τοῖς εὐθέσι τῇ καρδίᾳ" ποιεῖ ἃ ποιεῖ. ἐγὼ δὲ ὁ ἀκμὴν ἀβέβαιος-τὸν μετανοοῦντα λοιπὸν εἰσάγει-μικροῦ δεῖν ἐκλονήθην καὶ ἔπεσα. καὶ λέγω ἀποστολικὸν τούτῳ συνῳδόν· "οἴδαμεν ὅτι ὁ νόμος πνευματικός ἐστιν"-ἡμεῖς οἱ τέλειοι, οἱ τοῦ πνεύ ματος μαθηταί, οἱ τὸν θεῖον καὶ πνευματικὸν νόμον δεξάμενοι-. "ἐγὼ δὲ σάρκινός εἰμι, πεπραμένος ὑπὸ τὴν ἁμαρτίαν". οὐχ ὁ εἰδὼς ὅτι ὁ νόμος πνευματικός ἐστιν, σάρκινός ἐστιν ὑπὸ τὴν ἁμαρτίαν πεπραμένος· διέστελλεν γὰρ ἑαυτὸν ἀπ' ἐκείνων. "οἴδαμεν ὅτι ὁ νόμος πνευματικός ἐστιν", καθόλου λέγει περὶ τῶν ἁγίων. "ἐγὼ δὲ σάρκινός εἰμι, πεπραμένος ὑπὸ τὴν ἁμαρτίαν". καὶ πολλά γε δόγματα ὑποβάλλει αὕτη ἡ βραχυτάτη λέξις· "σάρκινός εἰμι"· οὐ κατὰ φύσιν, οὐκ ἐκ κατασκευῆς εἰμι τοιοῦτος, ἀλλὰ "πραθεὶς ὑπὸ τὴν ἁμαρτίαν". ὁ δὲ πραθεὶς ὑπό τινα δεσπότην ἵνα γένηται, οὔκ ἐστιν κατὰ φύσιν σάρκινος· ἐκ πράσεως̣ γὰρ̣ γεγένηται αὐτῷ ἡ κατάστασις ἡ οὕτω. καὶ ἐνταῦθα· "ὡς ἀγαθὸς τῷ Ἰσραὴλ ὁ θεός, τοῖς εὐθέσι τῇ καρδίᾳ. ἐμοῦ δὲ παρὰ μικρὸν ἐσαλεύθησαν οἱ πόδες", τῆς ψυχῆς δηλονότι. τό τε "παρὰ μικρὸν" τοῦτο δηλοῖ ὅτι ὅλως οὐ κεκλόνηται· ὁ γὰρ λέγων ὅτι· "παρὰ μικρὸν ἐσφάγην", δείκνυσιν ὅτι οὐκ ἐσφάγην. "παρ' ὀλίγον ἐξεχύθη τὰ διαβήματά μου". καλῶς ἔτρεχον, ἐβάδιζον ὡς δεῖ, ἔβαινον εὐθεῖα διαβήματα. μικροῦ δὲ δεῖν ἐξε̣χύθη ταῦτα. ἐκχύννεται δέ, ὅταν ἀναχαιτίσῃ καὶ εἰς τὰ ὀπίσω ὁ τρέχων στραφῇ. καὶ ἐξ αὐτῆς γοῦν τῆς λέξεως σκόπει· λάβε μοί τινα ἀνιόντα εἰς ὑψηλὸν τόπον ἀμμώδη . τὸν κλόνον οὖν τῶν ποδῶν μου ἑωρακότες καὶ οὔπω πτῶμα ἐπ' ἐμὲ ἐμεγαλορημόνησαν, ὑπε̣ρηφανίας λόγους εἰρή270 κασιν. εἴποι ἂν ἐν ἄλλῳ ῥητῷ· "μὴ ἐπίχαιρέ μοι, ἡ ἐχθρά μου, ὅτι πέπτωκα· ἀναστήσομαι". ὁ δὲ νῦν λέγων οὐδὲ ἔπεσεν ὅλως, ἀλλὰ μόνον ἐκλονήθησαν οἱ πόδες· εἰ γὰρ ὁ πεσὼν ἀν ίσταται καὶ τὴν ἐπίχαριν τῆς ἐχθρᾶς καταλείπει, πολλῷ πλέον ὁ μηδὲ πεσών. εὐκολώτερόν ἐστιν στῆσαι καὶ ἐρεῖσαι τοὺς πόδας ὅταν κλονηθῇ τις ἢ ἀναστῆναι πεπτωκότα. εἰ τοίνυν τὸ δυσχερὲς γίνεται, πολλῷ πλέον τὸ εὔκολον ταχέως κατορθοῦται. 18 ὅτι ἐγὼ εἰς μάστιγας ἕτοιμος. ἐγὼ κἂν ἐν κινήσει γέγονα καὶ ἡ ἰσχύς μου ἐνκατέλιπέν με καὶ τὸ φῶς τῶν ὀφθαλμῶν οὐκ ᾖν μετ' ἐμοῦ καὶ ἐκλονήθησαν οἱ πόδες μου, εἰς μάστιγάς εἰμι ἕτοιμος· μὴ γὰρ παραιτοῦμαι ὑπὸ σοῦ μαστιχθῆναι, ὡς υἱὸν ἀγαπώμενον παιδεύεις. "μὴ ὀλιγώρει παιδείας κυρίου· ὃν γὰρ ἀγαπᾷ κύριος παιδεύει, μαστιγοῖ δὲ πάντα υἱὸν ὃν παραδέχεται". ἐπεὶ τοίνυν υἱός εἰμι, εἰ καὶ μαστιγῶν αἴτια ἐμαυτῷ συνηγίοχα, παραιτοῦμαι δὲ τὸ ὑπ' ἐκείνων μεγαλορημονηθῆναι, τὸ ἐκείνων ὡς ἀνατρεπόντων. ἕτοιμος δέ εἰμι εἰς τὸ ὑπὸ σοῦ μαστιχθῆναι. 18 καὶ ἡ ἀλγηδών μου ἐνώπιόν μού ἐστιν διὰ παντός. ἀλγῶ ὅτι ὅλως γέγονα ἐν τοῖς ἐπιτιμίαν φέρουσιν, ἐν τοῖς φέρουσιν μάστιγας. ὁ λυπούμενος τὴν "κατὰ θεὸν λύπην τὴν μετάνοιαν εἰς σωτηρίαν" ἐπ̣ιφέρουσαν ἔχει τὴν ἀλγηδόνα ἐπίπροσθεν ἑαυτοῦ ἀεί. ὥσπερ ὁ ἔχων νεκρὸν καὶ ὀλοφυρόμενος αὐτὸν ὅσον ὁρᾷ αὐτὸν κλαίει, οὕτως ὁ γενόμενος ἐν τοῖς φέρουσιν ἀλγη δόνα ὅσον ὁρᾷ αὐτὰ ὀλοφύρεται καὶ κλαίει καὶ ἐπίπροσθεν ἑαυτοῦ ἔχει διὰ παντὸς τὴν ἀλγηδόνα. φέρε εἰπεῖν, οἷον γέγονέν τις ἐν νόσῳ ἀνιάτῳ· ἐκ τοῦ πόνου ταύτης τῆς νόσου ἔχει ἀλγηδόνα ἐπίπροσθεν. ἐὰν ἰατρός τις ἢ θεοῦ βοήθεια περιγράψῃ τὸ αἴτιον τῆς ἀλγηδόνος νόσημα, εὐθέως ἀποβάλλει τὴν ἀλγηδόνα καὶ λέγει· "ἔστρεψας τὸν κοπετόν μου εἰς χαρὰν ἐμοί". καὶ λέγει ὅτι· "ἤκουσεν κύριος καὶ ἐλέησέν με". καὶ ἵνα σαφέστερον εἴπω· Λάζαρος ὁ ἀδελφὸς τῶν περὶ τὴν Μαρίαν καὶ Μάρθαν τεθνήκει, καὶ ἐν ὅσῳ ἐν τῷ τεθνάναι ἦν, ἐλυποῦντο ἐκεῖναι καὶ εἰς