197

40.

A confession of the grace of the gifts of God; and how the father writing these things was moved by the Holy Spirit; and a teaching spoken by God, on what one must do to attain the salvation of those who are being saved. (296)

Again the light shines upon me, again it is clearly seen, again it opens the heavens, again it cuts through the night, again it produces all things, again it alone is seen, again it places me outside of all visible things, and likewise, alas, it separates [me] from things perceptible to the senses. Again He who is above all the heavens, whom no man has ever seen, without opening the heavens, without cutting through the night, nor parting the air, nor the roof of a house, indivisibly He becomes wholly with me, the wretched one, inside my cell, inside my mind, and in the midst of my heart, O awesome mystery! While all things remain as they are, the light comes to me and carries me up above all things, and while I am in the midst of all things, it places me outside of all things. I do not know if in the body also, but for now I truly become wholly there, where there is only light, simple, which seeing, I become simple in my guilelessness. These are Your paradoxical wonders, my Christ, (297) these are the works of Your power and love for mankind, which You work in us, the unworthy; for this reason, therefore, fear of You seizes me and I tremble and am continually anxious and am exceedingly consumed, with what I shall repay You, what I shall offer to You in return for so many gifts, so much compassion, innumerable gifts, which You have worked in me. But finding nothing in myself, nothing of my own in my life, but that all things are Your servants, all are the works of Your hands, I am the more ashamed, I am the more pained, I the more, O Savior, entreat to learn what I must do, that I might both serve you, that I might be well-pleasing, that I might be found uncondemned, O Savior, before your awesome judgment seat on the day of judgment. Hear what everyone who is to be saved should do, or rather, you first of all who also entreats me. Today, consider, you have died, today you have renounced,

197

Μ'.

Ὁμολογία τῆς χάριτος τῶν τοῦ Θεοῦ δωρεῶν˙ καί ὅπως ὁ ταῦτα γράφων πατήρ ὑπό τοῦ Ἁγίου ἐνηργεῖτο Πνεύματος˙ καί διδασκαλία ῥηθεῖσα ὑπό Θεοῦ, τοῦ τί δεῖ ποιοῦντα τινά, τῆς τῶν σῳζομένων σωτηρίας τυχεῖν. (296)

Πάλιν ἐκλάμπει μοι τό φῶς, πάλιν τρανῶς ὁρᾶται, πάλιν ἀνοίγει οὐρανούς, πάλιν τέμνει τήν νύκτα, πάλιν παράγει ἅπαντα, πάλιν ὁρᾶται μόνον, πάλιν ἁπάντων ἔξω με ποιεῖ τῶν ὁρωμένων, τῶν αἰσθητῶν ὡσαύτως δέ, βαβαί, ἀποχωρίζει. Πάλιν ὁ πάντων οὐρανῶν ὑπεράνω τυγχάνων, ὅνπερ οὐδείς ἑώρακε πώποτε τῶν ἀνθρώπων, μή διανοίγων οὐρανούς, μή διατέμνων νύκτα, μηδέ ἀέρα διϊστῶν μηδέ στέγην οἰκίας ἀτόμως ὅλος μετ᾿ ἐμοῦ γίνεται, τοῦ ἀθλίου, ἔνδοθεν τοῦ κελλίου μου, ἔνδοθεν τοῦ νοός μου καί μέσον τῆς καρδίας μου, ὤ φρικτοῦ μυστηρίου! Μενόντων πάντων ὡς εἰσί, παραγίνεται πρός με τό φῶς καί ἀναφέρει με τῶν πάντων ὑπεράνω, καί μέσον πάντων ὄντων με ἔξω ποιεῖ πάντων. Οὐκ οἶδα εἰ καί σώματι, τέως δ᾿ ἐκεῖσε ὅλος ἐπ᾿ ἀληθείας γίνομαι, ἔνθα φῶς ἐστι μόνον, ἁπλοῦν, ὅ βλέπων γίνομαι ἁπλοῦς τῇ ἀκακίᾳ. Ταῦτά σου τά παράδοξα, Χριστέ μου, τῶν θαυμάτων, (297) ταῦτα τῆς δυναστείας σου καί τῆς φιλανθρωπίας τά ἔργα, ἅπερ εἰς ἡμᾶς ποιεῖς τούς ἀναξίους˙ διά τοῦτο οὖν φόβος σου συνέχει με καί τρέμω καί μεριμνῶ διηνεκῶς καί δαπανῶμαι σφόδρα, τό τί ἀνταποδώσω σοι, τό τί σοι προσενέγκω ἀντί τοσούτων δωρεῶν, τοσαύτης εὐσπλαγχνίας, ἀναριθμήτων δωρεῶν, ὧν εἰς ἐμέ εἰργάσω. Μηδέν δ᾿ εὑρίσκων ἐν ἐμοί, μηδέν ἐμόν ἐν βίῳ, ἀλλά τά πάντα δοῦλα σά, ἔργα πάντα χειρῶν σου, μειζόνως καταισχύνομαι, μειζόνως ὀδυνῶμαι, μειζόνως, Σῶτερ, δυσωπῶ μαθεῖν, τί δεῖ ποιῆσαι, ἵνα καί θεραπεύσω σε, ἵνα εὐαρεστήσω, ἵν᾿ εὑρεθῶ ἐνώπιον ἀκατάκριτος, Σῶτερ, τοῦ βήματός σου τοῦ φρικτοῦ ἐν ἡμέρᾳ τῆς δίκης. Ἄκουσον τί ποιήσειε πᾶς ὁ μέλλων σωθῆναι, μᾶλλον δέ πρῶτος πάντων σύ ὁ καί παρακαλῶν με. Σήμερον, δόξον, τέθνηκας, σήμερον ἀπετάξω,