5. Also the question is wont to be asked, when a male and female, neither the one the husband, nor the other the wife, of any other, come together, not for the begetting of children, but, by reason of incontinence, for the mere sexual intercourse, there being between them this faith, that neither he do it with any other woman, nor she with any other man, whether it is to be called marriage.11 Nuptiœ And perhaps this may, not without reason, be called marriage,12 Connubium if it shall be the resolution13 Placuerit of both parties until the death of one, and if the begetting of children, although they came not together for that cause, yet they shun not, so as either to be unwilling to have children born to them, or even by some evil work to use means that they be not born. But, if either both, or one, of these be wanting, I find not how we can call it marriage. For, if a man should take unto him any one for a time, until he find another worthy either of his honors or of his means, to marry as his compeer; in his soul itself he is an adulterer, and that not with her whom he is desirous of finding, but with her, with whom he so lies, as not to have with her the partnership of a husband. Whence she also herself, knowing and willing this, certainly acts unchastely in having intercourse with him, with whom she has not the compact of a wife. However, if she keep to him faith of bed, and after he shall have married, have no thought of marriage herself, and prepare to contain herself altogether from any such work, perhaps I should not dare lightly to call her an adulteress; but who shall say that she sins not, when he is aware that she has intercourse with a man, not being his wife? But further, if from that intercourse, so far as pertains to herself, she has no wish but for sons, and suffers unwilling whatever she suffers beyond the cause of begetting; there are many matrons to whom she is to be preferred; who, although they are not adulteresses, yet force their husbands, for the most part also wishing to exercise continence, to pay the due of the flesh, not through desire of children, but through glow of lust making an intemperate use of their very right; in whose marriages, however, this very thing, that they are married, is a good. For for this purpose are they married, that the lust being brought under a lawful bond, should not float at large without form and loose; having of itself weakness of flesh that cannot be curbed, but of marriage fellowship of faith that cannot be dissolved; of itself encroachment of immoderate intercourse, of marriage a way of chastely begetting. For, although it be shameful to wish to use a husband for purposes of lust, yet it is honorable to be unwilling to have intercourse save with an husband, and not to give birth to children save from a husband. There are also men incontinent to that degree, that they spare not their wives even when pregnant. Therefore whatever that is immodest, shameless, base, married persons do one with another, is the sin of the persons, not the fault of marriage.
CAPUT V.
5. Conjunctio viri et feminae quandonam sit connubium, quando non. Solet etiam quaeri, cum masculus et femina, nec ille maritus, nec illa uxor alterius, sibimet non filiorum procreandorum, sed propter incontinentiam solius concubitus causa copulantur, ea fide media, ut nec ille cum altera, nec illa cum altero id faciat, utrum nuptiae sint vocandae. Et potest quidem fortasse non absurde hoc appellari connubium, si usque ad mortem alterius eorum id inter eos placuerit, et prolis generationem, quamvis non ea causa conjuncti sint, non tamen vitaverint, ut vel nolint sibi nasci filios, vel etiam opere aliquo malo agant ne nascantur. Caeterum si vel utrumque vel unum horum desit, non invenio quemadmodum has nuptias appellare possimus. Etenim si aliquam sibi 0377 vir ad tempus adhibuerit, donec aliam dignam vel honoribus vel facultatibus suis inveniat, quam comparem ducat; ipso animo adulter est, nec cum illa quam cupit invenire, sed cum ista cum qua sic cubat, ut cum ea non habeat maritale consortium. Unde et ipsa hoc sciens ac volens, impudice utique miscetur ei, cum quo non habet foedus uxorium. Verumtamen si ei thori fidem servet, et cum ille uxorem duxerit, nubere ipsa non cogitet, atque a tali prorsus opere continere se praeparet, adulteram quidem fortassis facile appellare non audeam; non peccare tamen quis dixerit, cum eam viro, cujus uxor non est, misceri sciat? Jamvero si ex illo concubitu, quantum ad ipsam attinet, non nisi filios velit, et quidquid ultra causam procreandi patitur invita patiatur: multis quidem ista matronis anteponenda est; quae tametsi non sunt adulterae, viros tamen suos plerumque etiam continere cupientes ad reddendum carnale debitum cogunt, non desiderio prolis, sed ardore concupiscentiae ipso suo jure intemperanter utentes: in quarum tamen nuptiis bonum est hoc ipsum quod nuptae sunt. Ad hoc enim nuptae sunt, ut illa concupiscentia redacta ad legitimum vinculum, non deformis et dissoluta fluitaret, habens de se ipsa irrefrenabilem carnis infirmitatem, de nuptiis autem indissolubilem fidei societatem; de se ipsa progressum immoderate coeundi, de nuptiis modum caste procreandi. Etsi enim turpe est libidinose uti velle marito ; honestum est tamen nolle misceri nisi marito, et non parere nisi de marito.
CAPUT VI.
De conjugalis debiti exactione ac redditione. Sunt item viri usque adeo incontinentes, ut conjugibus nec gravidis parcant. Quidquid ergo inter se conjugati immodestum, inverecundum, sordidum gerunt, vitium est hominum, non culpa nuptiarum.