77. We, however, will not disturb their names, for we could not change them into any other name more ridiculous than what they have----their "Phalli" and their "Ithyphalli," their "Melampygi" and their "Apygi," their "Tragopan," and their venerable "Pan" himself, one god born out of many lovers,⁶² and receiving his disgrace for his name; for with them it is necessary either that the one and the most excellent Being should have sinned against many women, or else that he was the son of many fathers, and the most vile in his origin. We therefore will not begrudge them either their doings or their names, but let them enjoy their own folly, and pride themselves upon things the most disgraceful, and, should they wish it, we will leave them their "Bulleater," and their "Child of three Nights," in order the more to gratify them; him that was begotten and that begot others so respectably: performing for his thirteenth labour the feat of the fifty daughters of Thestias in one night, in order that through such exploits he might be styled a god. For the Christians (if they chose, that is) had many appellations to fit him selected out of his own stock, and those more disgraceful and more proper for him than the name he gave us. For what should have hindered us from joking in return with the emperor of the Romans (and as he fancied himself, deluded as he was by his demons, of all the world), and styling him "Idolianus," and "Pisaeas," and "Adonaeus," and "Bull-burner," as some of the wits amongst us actually entitled him (inasmuch as this were a very easy business), and whatever other names history supplies us with, either to parody or to coin consistently with truth?

ΟΖʹ. Ἡμεῖς δὲ οὐ παρακινήσομεν αὐτοῖς τὰ ὀνόματα: οὐδὲ γάρ ἐστιν εἰς ὅ τι μεταθείημεν ἂν ἄλλο γελοιότερον, τοὺς φαλλοὺς, καὶ τοὺς ἰθυφάλλους, καὶ τοὺς μελαμπύγους, καὶ τοὺς ἀπύγους, καὶ τὸν τραγόπουν, καὶ τὸν σεμνὸν Πᾶνα, τὸν ἐκ πάντων μνηστήρων ἕνα θεὸν, καὶ ὄνομα λαβόντα τὴν ὕβριν, ὥσπερ ἦν ἄξιον. Δεῖ γὰρ ἢ ἀδικεῖν παρ' ἐκείνοις εἰς πολλὰς ἕνα καὶ τὸν κράτιστον, ἢ ἐκ πολλῶν γίνεσθαι καὶ τὸν αἴσχιστον: οὐκοῦν φθονήσομεν αὐτοῖς οὔτε τῶν πραγμάτων οὔτε τῶν ὀνομάτων: ἀλλ' ἀπολαυέτωσαν τῆς ἑαυτῶν εὐηθείας, καὶ τοῖς αἰσχίστοις ἐγκαλλωπιζέσθωσαν: εἰ βούλοιντο δὲ, καὶ τὸν Βουθοίναν παρήσομεν αὐτοῖς, καὶ τὸν Τριέσπερον, ἵνα καὶ μᾶλλον αὐτοῖς χαρισώμεθα: τὸν καὶ γεννώμενον οὕτω, καὶ γεννῶντα μεγαλοπρεπῶς, καὶ ἆθλον ποιησάμενον τρισκαιδέκατον, ἐν μιᾷ νυκτὶ, τὰς Θεστίου πεντήκοντα θυγατέρας, ἵν' ἐκ τούτων ὀνομασθῇ θεός: ἐπεὶ βουλομένοις γε τὰ τοιαῦτα καινοτομεῖν, καὶ πολλαὶ κατ' ἐκείνου κλήσεις ἐκ τῶν ἐκείνου Χριστιανοῖς αἰσχίους τε ἅμα καὶ οἰκειοτέραι. Τί γὰρ ἂν κωλύσειε καὶ ἡμᾶς τῷ βασιλεῖ κατὰ τὸ ἴσον ἀντιπαίζοντας Ῥωμαίων, ὡς δὲ ᾤετο, καὶ τῆς οἰκουμένης, ἠπατημένος τοῖς δαίμοσι, τὸν Εἰδωλιανὸν καλεῖν, καὶ τὸν Πισαῖον, καὶ τὸν Ἀδωναῖον, καὶ τὸν Καυσίταυρον, ὅπερ καὶ ἤδη τινὲς αὐτὸν τῶν παρ' ἡμῖν κομψῶν ὠνομάκασιν, ἐπειδὴ ῥᾳστώνη πολλὴ τοῦ πράγματος, ὅσα τε ἄλλα παραποιεῖν ἢ ποιεῖν ἐκ τῆς ἀληθείας ἡ ἱστορία δίδωσι;