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with a voice: "Have mercy on me, the sinner and unworthy to live, but truly worthy of all punishment" and whatever else the grace of God may give you to say. And calling to mind your sinful deeds, strike yourself forcefully and unsparingly, saying: "How have you done such and such things, O wicked and wretched one?" and again stretch out your hands and stand praying to God. Then again slap your face, pull your hair, dragging it as if of some stranger and treacherous enemy to you, and say: "Why have you done such and such things?" and thus having scourged yourself sufficiently, then bind your hands in front and stand with a cheerful soul. And having done two or three psalms with understanding and as many prostrations as you perceive you are able, stand again with concentration and ponder in yourself the aforementioned things, if ever God might grant tears and compunction to come upon you. And if this happens, do not withdraw until they pass; but if not, do not be distressed, but say these things to yourself: "Compunction and tears are for the worthy and for those prepared for them. But you, how many years have you beseeched God or served him? By which of your works have you prepared yourself for their reception? Is it not enough for you that you are even alive?". Having said these things and having given thanks, having sealed your face and breast and your whole body with the sign of the precious cross, falling upon your mat, lie down.
And when you become awake, do not turn to the other side, but immediately rising again, pray in the aforementioned manner and do not sleep any longer, but persevere in prayer and (392) reading, until the wood strikes, and then with everyone go to the assembly and stand in the church, as with angels in heaven, trembling, considering yourself unworthy even of standing there with the brethren. And while standing pay attention to yourself, not to look here and there and not to observe the brethren curiously, how each one stands or how he chants, but pay attention only to yourself and to the psalmody and to your sins. And remember also the prayer in the cell, do not engage at all in the assembly in any idle talk, do not leave from there before the final prayer. If possible, do not even sit down for the reading, but withdraw to a hidden place and stand listening, as if He Himself, the God over all, were speaking to you through the reader. But if you yourself are urged to read, be so disposed as one unworthy to recount through your mouth the divinely-inspired Scriptures to your brethren, and having finished the divine reading and being about to make the customary prostration to both choirs, do not do it contemptuously nor lazily, but considering them all sons of God and saints, fall down and bring your head close to the ground, say mystically in your heart to them all: "Pray and forgive me, the sinner and unworthy of heaven and earth, O saints of God." And if you are ordered to lead the canon, do not do this lazily nor listlessly, but with understanding and sobriety as before the king of all, Christ, distributing the divine oracles to the brethren through your voice as by hand, and fear lest you contemptuously omit (393) to give to anyone the life-giving bread, that is, the word of God, as has been said, and be cast out as a despiser, I do not say to you outside this church, but outside the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, going out after the dismissal, remember how you passed yesterday and, if you erred in anything, correct it today.
Therefore if you persist in doing these things, the Lord will not delay to show his mercy with you, I am the guarantor of the merciful One, I of the lover of mankind, if it is bold to say, offer myself as surety! I shall die, if He overlooks you. In your place I will be handed over to the eternal fire, if He forsakes you. Only do not do these things with a doubting heart, nor with a double mind!
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φωνῇ· "Ἐλέησόν με τόν ἁμαρτωλόν καί ἀνάξιον τοῦ ζῆν, ἄξιον δέ πάσης ὄντως κολάσεως" καί ἄλλα ὅσα ἡ τοῦ Θεοῦ χάρις δῴη σοι τοῦ εἰπεῖν. Ἀναμνημονεύων δέ τῶν ἐφαμάρτων σου πράξεων, τύπτε σφοδρῶς καί ἀφειδῶς σεαυτόν λέγων· "Πῶς τά καί τά, πονηρέ καί ἄθλιε, πέπραχας; " καί πάλιν στρέψον τάς χεῖρας καί ἵστασο δεόμενος τοῦ Θεοῦ. Εἶτα ῥάπιζε πάλιν τό πρώσωπόν σου, τίλλε τάς τρίχας σου, σύρων αὐτάς, ὡς ξένου τινός καί ἐπιβούλου σοι γεγονότος ἐχθροῦ, καί εἰπέ· "∆ιατί τά καί τά πεπεοίηκας;" καί οὕτω μαστίξας σεαυτόν ἱκανῶς, δῆσον τότε τάς χεῖράς σου ἔμπροσθεν καί στῆθι ἐν ἱλαρᾷ τῇ ψυχῇ. Ποιήσας δέ ψαλμούς δύο ἤ τρεῖς νουνεχῶς καί προσκυνήσεις, ὅσας νοήσεις σεαυτόν δύνασθαι, στῆθι πάλιν σύννους καί τά προειρημένα ἀναλογίζου ἐν σεαυτῷ, εἴποτε καί δῴη ὁ Θεός ἐλθεῖν ἐπί σέ δάκρυα καί κατάνυξιν. Καί εἰ μέν τοῦτο γένηται, μή ὑποχωρήσῃς ἕως ἄν παρέλθωσιν· εἰ δ᾿ οὖν, μή θλιβῇς, ἀλλ᾿ εἰπέ ταῦτα πρός ἑαυτόν· "Ἡ κατάνυξις καί τά δάκρυα τῶν ἀξίων καί πρός ταῦτα ηὐπρεπισμένων εἰσί. Σύ δέ πόσα ἔτη παρεκάλεσας τόν Θεόν ἤ ἐδούλευσας αὐτῷ; ∆ιά ποίων σου ἔργων ηὐτρέπισας πρός ὑποδοχήν αὐτῶν σεαυτόν; Οὐκ ἀρκεῖ σοι ὅτι καί ζῇς;". Ταῦτα εἰπών καί εὐχαριστήσας κατασφραγισάμενος πρόσωπόν τε καί στῆθος καί ὅλον τό σῶμά σου τῷ σημείῳ τοῦ τιμίου σταυροῦ, ἐπί τοῦ ψιαθίου σου πεσών ἀνακλίθητι.
Ὅτε δέ ἔξυπνος γένῃ, μή στραφῇς ἐπί τό ἕτερον μέρος, ἀλλ᾿ εὐθύς ἀναστάς πάλιν εὖξαι τῷ προειρημένῳ τρόπῳ καί μηκέτι ὑπνώσῃς, ἀλλά εὐχῇ καί (392) ἀναγνώσει καρτέρησον, ἕως οὗ τό ξύλον κρούσει, καί τότε μετά πάντων εἰς τήν σύναξιν ἄπελθε καί στῆθι ἐν τῷ ναῷ, ὡς μετά ἀγγέλων ἐν τῷ οὐρανῷ, σύντρομος, ἀνάξιον ἑαυτόν ἡγούμενος καί τῆς ἐκεῖσε μετά τῶν ἀδελφῶν παραστάσεως. Ἱστάμενος δέ πρόσεχε σεαυτῷ, τοῦ μή βλέπειν ὧδε κἀκεῖσε καί περιεργάζεσθαι τούς ἀδελφούς, πῶς ἕκαστος ἵσταται ἤ πῶς ψάλλει, ἀλλά σεαυτῷ μόνῳ καί τῇ ψαλμωδίᾳ καί ταῖς ἁμαρτίαις σου πρόσεχε. Μιμνήσκου δέ καί τῆς ἐν τῷ κελλίῳ εὐχῆς, μή συντύχῃς ὅλως ἐν τῇ συνάξει τινί λόγον ἀργόν, μή ἐξέλθῃς ἐκεῖθεν πρό τῆς ἐσχάτης εὐχῆς. Εἰ δυνατόν, μηδέ εἰς ἀνάγνωσιν καθίσῃς, ἀλλ᾿ ἐν τόπῳ κρυπτῷ ὑποχώρει καί ἵστασο ἀκούων, ὡς ἐκείνου αὐτοῦ σοι λαλοῦντος διά τοῦ ἀναγνώστου, τοῦ ἐπί πάντων Θεοῦ. Εἰ δέ καί αὐτός προτραπῇς εἰς ἀνάγνωσιν, ὡς ἀνάξιος ὤν τοῦ ἐκδιηγεῖσθαι διά τοῦ στόματός σου τάς θεοπνεύστους τοῖς ἀδελφοῖς σου Γραφάς, οὔτω διάκεισο, καί τελειώσας τήν θείαν ἀνάγνωσιν καί τήν συνήθη μέλλων εἰς ἀμφοτέρους τούς χορούς βαλεῖν μετάνοιαν, μή καταφρονητικῶς μηδέ ῥᾳθύμως, ἀλλ᾿ ὡς υἱούς Θεοῦ καί ἁγίους ἅπαντας λογιζόμενος, προσπεσών καί τῷ ἐδάφει προσεγγίσας τήν κεφαλήν σου, λέγε μυστικῶς ἐν τῇ καρδίᾳ σου πρός πάντας αὐτούς· "Εὔξασθε καί συγχωρήσατέ μοι, τῷ ἁμαρτωλῷ καί ἀναξίῳ τοῦ οὐρανοῦ καί τῆς γῆς, ἅγιοι τοῦ Θεοῦ". Ἐάν δέ καί κανοναρχῆσαι προσταχθῇς, μή ῥαθύμως μηδέ ἐκλυομένως τοῦτο ποιῇς, ἀλλά νουνεχῶς καί νηφόντως ὡς ἐνώπιον τοῦ ἐπί πάντων βασιλέως Χριστοῦ τά θεῖα λόγια διά τῆς σῆς φωνῆς ὡς διά χειρός τοῖς ἀδελφοῖς διανέμων, καί φοβοῦ μή τινι καταφρονητικῶς παραλείψῃς (393) δοῦναι τόν ζωοποιόν ἄρτον ἤτοι τόν λόγον, ὡς εἴρηται, τοῦ Θεοῦ καί ἐκβληθήσῃ ἔξω ὡς καταφρονητής, οὐ λέγω σοι ταύτης ἔξω τῆς ἐκκλησίας, ἀλλά τῆς βασιλείας τῶν οὐρανῶν. Ἐξελθών οὖν μετά τήν ἀπόλυσιν, μνήσθητι ὅπως τήν χθές ἡμέραν διηνύσας καί, εἰ ἐσφάλης ἔν τινι, διόρθωσαι σήμερον.
Ταῦτα τοιγαροῦν εἰ ἐμμείνῃς ποιῶν, οὐ βραδύνει Κύριος τοῦ ποιῆσαι ἔλεος αὐτοῦ μετά σοῦ, ἐγώ τοῦ εὐσπλάχνου ἐγγυητής, ἐγώ τοῦ φιλανθρώπου, εἰ καί τολμηρόν εἰπεῖν, ἐμαυτόν ὑποτίθημι ἀντιφωνητήν! Ἀποθανοῦμαι ἐγώ, ἐάν ὑπερίδῃ σε. Ἀντί σοῦ τῷ πυρί τῷ αἰωνίῳ παραδοθήσομαι, ἐάν ἐγκαταλείψῃ σε. Μόνον μή ἐν δισταγμῷ καρδίας, μηδέ ἐν διψυχίᾳ ταῦτα ποιῇς!