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I wish to think, and I think things that I do not wish. And it is necessary to consider if it was not for these very reasons that David also petitioned God, being vexed at his own thinking of things he did not wish: “Cleanse me from my secret faults, and from alien things spare your servant. If they do not gain dominion over me, then I shall be blameless and I shall be cleansed from great sin.” And the apostle himself in another place: “casting down reasonings and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.” 58. But if someone, daring to engage with the argument, should answer that the apostle teaches that not only in thinking the evil which we hate 2.492 and which we do not want do we do it, but also in actually doing and accomplishing it, because it was said, “For I do not do the good that I want, but the evil I do not want, this I practice,” we shall ask, I suppose, if the one saying these things speaks truly, for him to clarify what was the evil that the apostle hated and which he did not wish to do, but did, and the good, which he wished to do, but did not, but conversely, as often as he wished to do the good, so often it was not the good that he wished, but the evil that he did not wish, that he did. For was it that, not wanting to commit idolatry but to worship God, what he wanted, to worship God, he could not do, but what he did not want, to commit idolatry, he could do? Or what he wanted, to be temperate, he did not do, but what he detested, to be licentious, he did? And in summary, to be given to drunkenness, but to live dissolutely and be angry, to do wrong and all the other works of wickedness, which he did not want, he did, but what he wanted, righteousness and holiness, he did not do? And yet he himself, in the churches, urgently stirring up everyone not to be lawless, declares that not only those who do and practice wicked things are reserved for destruction and wrath, but also those who approve of them in these things, contending that what is right should be practiced among us unmixed with sin. For every sin and practice obtains its conclusion through the flesh. Often, at any rate, in his epistles, openly teaching these very things, he says that we should turn away from and hate them: “Do not be deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor robbers 2.493 will inherit the kingdom of God”; and, as the chief point, urging us to flee completely from all sinning and to shake it off, he declares, “Be imitators of me, as I also am of Christ.” Thus, he did not mean by the aforementioned words the doing and practicing of what he did not want, but only the thinking of them; for how could he be an exact imitator of Christ? But now, since bestial thoughts often fall upon us, filling us at different times in different ways with desires and irrational curiosity, “like the many swarms of buzzing flies,” he said, “For what I do not want, that I do”; which one must boldly scare away from the soul, in no way consenting to do the things suggested by them. For in order that we may be approved for the kingdom of heaven, having been tested in all pleasures and pains, if we are not changed but everywhere, just as pure gold tested by fire, we do not depart from our proper virtue, this happens, that the mind is troubled by many things. Wherefore, indeed, it is necessary to draw up in battle array nobly, like the best soldiers, who, whenever they perceive they are besieged by the enemy, taking no thought of archery and their other javelins, for the sake of saving the city, eagerly rush upon them, lacking nothing in zeal, until having turned their phalanx to flight, they drive them outside the borders. For you see how the thoughts, because of the sin dwelling in us, are gathered together from outside, just like rabid dogs or wild and bold robbers, always urged on against us 2.494 by the tyrant and ruler of unrighteousness, testing us to see if we are sufficient to stand against them and draw up in battle array. 59. Come then, lest at any time giving way

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θέλω ἐννοεῖσθαι καὶ ἐννοοῦμαι ὅσα μὴ θέλω. καὶ ἐπισκέψασθαι δεῖ εἰ μὴ διὰ ταῦτα αὐτὰ καὶ ὁ ∆αυὶδ ἐνετύγχανε τῷ θεῷ, δυσχεραίνων ἐπὶ τῷ λογίζεσθαι καὶ αὐτὸν ἃ μὴ ἤθελεν· «ἀπὸ τῶν κρυφίων μου καθάρισόν με καὶ ἀπὸ ἀλλοτρίων φεῖσαι τοῦ δούλου σου. ἐὰν μή μου κατακυριεύσωσι, τότε ἄμωμος ἔσομαι καὶ καθαρισθήσομαι ἀπὸ ἁμαρτίας μεγάλης». καὶ αὐτὸς δὲ ὁ ἀπόστολος ἐν ἑτέρῳ «λογισμοὺς καθαιροῦντες καὶ πᾶν ὕψωμα ἐπαιρόμενον κατὰ τῆς γνώσεως τοῦ θεοῦ, καὶ αἰχμαλωτίζοντες πᾶν νόημα εἰς τὴν ὑπακοὴν τοῦ Χριστοῦ». 58. Εἰ δέ τις ὁμόσε τῷ λόγῳ ἰέναι τολμῶν ἀποκρίνοιτο ὡς ἄρα διδάσκει ὁ ἀπόστολος ὡς οὐ μόνον ἐν τῷ λογίζεσθαι τὸ κακὸν ὃ μισοῦμεν 2.492 καὶ ὃ οὐ θέλομεν πράσσομεν, ἀλλὰ καὶ ἐν τῷ ποιεῖν αὐτὸ καὶ κατεργάζεσθαι, διὰ τό «οὐ γὰρ ὃ θέλω ποιῶ» λελέχθαι «ἀγαθόν, ἀλλ' ὃ οὐ θέλω κακόν, τοῦτο πράσσω», ἀξιώσομέν που, εἰ ἀληθῆ λέγει ὁ ταῦτα λέγων, διασαφῆσαι τί ἦν τὸ κακόν, ὃ ἐμίσει ὁ ἀπόστολος καὶ ὃ οὐκ ἐβούλετο μὲν ποιεῖν, ἐποίει δέ, καὶ τὸ ἀγαθόν, ὃ ἐβούλετο μὲν ποιεῖν, οὐκ ἐποίει δέ, ἀλλὰ ἀντιστρόφως ὁσάκις μὲν ἤθελε ποιῆσαι τὸ ἀγαθόν, τοσαυτάκις οὐ τὸ ἀγαθὸν ὃ ἤθελεν, ἀλλὰ τὸ πονηρὸν ὃ μὴ ἤθελεν ἐποίει. ἄρα γὰρ οὐ θέλων εἰδωλολατρεῖν ἀλλὰ θεολατρεῖν, ὃ μὲν ἤθελε θεολατρεῖν οὐκ ἠδύνατο, ὃ δὲ μὴ ἤθελεν εἰδωλολατρεῖν ἠδύνατο, ἢ σωφρονεῖν μὲν ὃ ἤθελεν οὐκ ἐποίει, ἀκολασταίνειν δὲ ὃ ἤχθετο ἐποίει; καὶ συλλήβδην κραιπαλᾶν, ἀλλὰ ἀσωτεύεσθαι καὶ θυμοῦσθαι, ἀδικεῖν καὶ τὰ ἄλλα ὅσα πονηρίας ἔργα, ἃ μὴ ἤθελε μὲν ἐποίει, ἃ δὲ ἤθελε, δικαιοσύνην καὶ ὁσιότητα, οὐκ ἐποίει; καὶ μὴν αὐτὸς ἐν ταῖς ἐκκλησίαις προτροπάδην ἐξεγείρων πάντας εἰς τὸ μὴ ἀνομεῖν οὐ μόνον τοὺς ποιοῦντας καὶ ἐπιτηδεύοντας τὰ ἄτοπα ὀλέθρῳ τηρεῖσθαι καὶ ὀργῇ παρεγγυᾷ, ἀλλὰ καὶ τοὺς συνευδοκοῦντας αὐτοῖς εἰς ταῦτα, ἀμιγὲς ἁμαρτίας ἐν ἡμῖν τὸ δίκαιον ἀσκεῖσθαι διαμιλλώμενος. πᾶν γὰρ ἁμάρτημα καὶ ἐπιτήδευμα τὸ συμπέρασμα κτᾶται διὰ τῆς σαρκός. πολλάκις γοῦν ἐν ταῖς ἐπιστολαῖς ἀναφανδὸν αὐτὰ δὴ ταῦτα διδάσκων ἡμᾶς ὑπεκτρέπεσθαι καὶ μισεῖν φησί «μὴ πλανᾶσθε· οὔτε πόρνοι οὔτε εἰδωλολάτραι οὔτε μοιχοὶ οὔτε μαλακοὶ οὔτε ἀρσενοκοῖται οὔτε κλέπται οὔτε πλεονέκται οὔτε μέθυσοι οὐ λοίδοροι οὐχ ἅρπαγες 2.493 βασιλείαν θεοῦ κληρονομήσουσι»· καὶ τὸ κορυφαιότατον, εἰς τὸ παντάπασιν ἡμᾶς ἐκ παντὸς ἀποδρᾶναι καὶ ἀποτινάξασθαι τὸ ἁμαρτάνειν προτρέπων «μιμηταί μου» ἀποφαίνεται «γίνεσθε, καθάπερ κἀγὼ Χριστοῦ». οὕτως οὐ τὸ ποιεῖν ἃ μὴ ἤθελε καὶ πράττειν ὑπέθετο τὰ προειρημένα, ἀλλὰ τὸ μόνον λογίζεσθαι· ἐπεὶ πῶς ἂν ἦν μιμητὴς ἀκριβὴς τοῦ Χριστοῦ; νυνὶ δὲ ἐπειδήπερ ἐμπίπτουσι θηριώδεις πολλάκις λογισμοί, ἐπιθυμίας ἡμᾶς ἄλλοτε ἄλλως ἐμπιπλάντες καὶ περιεργίας ἀλόγου, ἠΰτε μυιάων ἀδινάων ἔθνεα πολλά, ἔφη «τὸ γὰρ ὃ οὐ θέλω, τοῦτο ποιῶ»· ἃ χρὴ τῆς ψυχῆς εὐθαρσῶς ἀποσοβεῖν, μηδὲν ὅλως εἰς τὸ ποιῆσαι τὰ ὑπ' αὐτῶν ὑπηχούμενα νεύοντας. ἵνα γὰρ ἐγκριθῶμεν εἰς τὴν βασιλείαν τῶν οὐρανῶν, ἐν πάσαις ἡδοναῖς καὶ λύπαις δοκιμασθέντες, εἰ μὴ μεταβαλλοίμεθα ἀλλὰ πανταχοῦ καθάπερ ἀκήρατος χρυσὸς διὰ πυρὸς βασανιζόμενος οὐκ ἐξιστάμεθα τῆς οἰκείας ἀρετῆς, συμβαίνει τοῦτο τὸ διοχλεῖσθαι τὸν νοῦν ὑπὸ πολλῶν. ὅθεν δὴ γενναίως ὥσπερ στρατιώτας ἀρίστους ἀντιπαρατάσσεσθαι δεῖ, οἳ ἐπειδὰν ὑπὸ τῶν ἐχθρῶν αἴσθωνται πολιορκούμενοι, τοξείας οὐδὲν φροντίσαντες καὶ τῶν ἄλλων αὐτῶν ἀκοντισμάτων, ὑπὲρ τοῦ σῶσαι τὴν πόλιν προθύμως ἐπ' αὐτοὺς ἵενται, μηδὲν ἐλλείποντες σπουδῆς, ἔστ' ἂν τὸ στῖφος αὐτῶν εἰς φυγὴν ἀνατρέψαντες ἀπώσωνται τῶν ὅρων ἔξω. ὁρᾷς γὰρ ὡς οἱ λογισμοὶ διὰ τὴν ἐνοικοῦσαν ἁμαρτίαν ἐν ἡμῖν ἔξωθεν ἐπισυνίστανται, καθαπερεὶ κύνες λυσσῶντες ἢ ἄγριοι καὶ θρασεῖς λῃσταὶ καθ' ἡμῶν ἀεὶ 2.494 παρορμώμενοι ὑπὸ τοῦ τυράννου καὶ ἄρχοντος τῆς ἀδικίας, δοκιμάζοντος ἡμᾶς εἰ ἀνθίστασθαι αὐτοῖς ἀρκοῦμεν καὶ ἀντιπαρατάσσεσθαι. 59. Ἄγε οὖν, μή ποτε ὑπενδοῦσα